Modern society has not progressed at all since it was first introduced. Certainly, technological advancements have occurred. It’s better for the world too. Societal changes haven’t taken place in the meantime. In his 1841 essay, Self-Reliance, Ralph Waldo Emerson stated it best: “Societal change can be seen as a wave. Despite the movement of the wave, the water of which it is composed does not. “Humans haven’t evolved in a significant way. The issues you’re currently dealing with aren’t anything new. And one of those issues is that we’re a little too reliant on others. Very reliant. What’s wrong with that? You can never be truly happy unless you are able to rely on yourself. Even though, in my opinion, happiness isn’t the point of life, it’s still important to us. Quality of life is directly correlated to the level of contentment. Nobody wants to lead a dreary existence.
Consider your level of self-sufficiency.
- How much do you count on your significant other to make you content?
- Your friends should always be there for you, don’t you believe?
- Expecting a paycheck from your boss is a reasonable expectation.
- Your products or services don’t sell because people don’t want to pay for them.
- Is it difficult for you to spend time on your own?
- Is it demoralising to be ignored by co-workers?
- The absence of an invitation to a birthday party or other social event can be painful for many people.
I can’t say that I haven’t had those thoughts in the past. All of the above questions were answered “yes” in the past. To put it another way, I was the antithesis of self-sufficiency. That we are this way is not surprising. Our lives begin the moment we are born. For our survival, we rely on our parents. As adults, we should be able to fend for ourselves, but we end up even more dependent on others.
We always seek happiness, advice, affection, love, and approval from others in our lives. We seek guidance from experts. When we’re in pain, we turn to drugs. It’s common for us to expect others to take care of our problems. In our minds, we never consider the possibility that we don’t need those things. It’s wonderful to be a contributing member of society. But be careful not to overdo it. To avoid this outcome, you become a helpless robot incapable of self-sufficiency. Trusting in yourself is always the best option. In no way, shape, or form. On the other hand, in a more emotional sense. You don’t have to rely on others to be happy.
Confide in Yourself
Emerson adds the following to his essay on self-reliance: “Trust thyself: the iron string resonates with every heart. “As a human being, you have to deal with paradoxes in your daily life. The people we care about want to like and love us. The problem is that once we lose our identity, we are no longer capable of being the person we want to be. Your relationships will suffer in the long run if you are needy. However, we also believe that relying solely on oneself is a bad idea. However, this is not the case. Because you can have a much greater impact on those around you when you are self-sufficient. This is something I only became aware of in the last few years. Emotional self-reliance is a skill that I admit I have yet to fully master, but I have taken significant steps that have had a positive impact on my life. It’s something that everyone should be able to do. Here are six tips for developing emotional independence that you’ll find in the following paragraphs.
I’ve drawn these lessons from Stoicism, Transcendentalism, and Pragmatism. This is it.
1. Make yourself heard.
Isn’t it common to be afraid to say out loud what you’re thinking or feeling? We’ve come to believe that we have to always be on the same page with everyone. That causes us to be apprehensive about conflict. Instead of being afraid to speak your mind, stand up straight and say what you really think. Also, don’t be afraid to get into a fight. To have a voice in the world, you can’t just sit back and expect it to happen without a fight. For the next few weeks, don’t be afraid to engage in verbal arguments with others. In no way, shape, or form. If you don’t think something is right, say so. The phrase “I don’t care” is frequently uttered by us when we are in the midst of a disagreement. And then we’re gone. As far as I know, this is true. There must be something fundamentally wrong with you. It’s a form of self-preservation. It’s always more difficult to speak your mind and stand up for what you believe in. Because of this, you don’t have to agree with everything your heroes or models say. My admiration for many people doesn’t make them saints, but I admire them nonetheless. Nobody is.
2. Understand and control your emotions.
When it comes to expressing our feelings, we’re far too quick to jump to conclusions.
“I’ve had enough.”
“It’s a lousy day.”
“No one can be trusted.”
“My stomach hurts.”
In the words of one employee, “My boss is an egomaniac. “What does it matter? If you let all your feelings out, nothing will change. As a result, expressing your feelings isn’t always a good idea. As an alternative, you should learn to control your emotions and feelings. I don’t want you to turn into a robot for my sake. Emotions serve a purpose, and you should know that. Do you feel depressed at this moment? You’re in love, right? Is your heart broken? Never be afraid to speak your mind. That’s not a joke. If so, I’d like to know why. What was it like to be a kid? Take a look in the mirror. Don’t succumb to irrational feelings.
3. Rejoice in the face of adversity
Most people avoid confronting their inner turmoil and difficulties. Finding yourself doesn’t necessitate a long journey across the globe. It’s important to keep in mind that your problems will always follow you wherever you go. Do not be afraid to confront your obstacles and inner demons. Then again, I’m a fan of going the extra mile. I’m grateful when things go wrong with my health, relationships, or finances. Self-reliance can be tested at every setback. That’s why overcoming adversity should be celebrated. If you don’t have it, you won’t ever be a complete and trustworthy person.
4. Detach yourself from the rest of the world.
Nothing in this world is everlasting. Every day, it is easy for us to forget. Things, people, and memories hold a special place in our hearts. To truly appreciate something, you must accept the fact that it will eventually be taken away from you. It’s easy to become lazy if you believe that you’ll live forever or that you’ll be loved until the end of the world. Things will become second nature to you. The problem is that once you separate yourself from everything in life, you become a passenger who tries to get the most out of every single second. Remember: I owe no one anything, and no one owes me anything. In doing so, you become both self-sufficient and appreciative of life.
5. Get used to your own skin.
When you’re on your own, do you freak out? Most of us can’t bear the idea of being alone for more than a few hours at a time. Go for a walk instead of texting or calling a friend. Take a stroll around the city. Perhaps you should bring a book along. Take a break and go to a coffeehouse. Take a sip of something. I’ll read your book. Talk to a stranger, if you can. Let your mind wander a little. If you don’t enjoy reading, consider taking up a new hobby, such as learning a language or attending meetups. To fill your time, there are countless options. To have a good time, you don’t need anyone else. Keep a running to-do list handy at all times. Don’t worry if one thing doesn’t work out; instead, spend your time doing something else (just don’t waste it). Be at ease in your skin because it is the only one you will ever have.
6. Don’t hold on to anything that you don’t want.
Life is made up of a jumble of random experiences and choices. We’re always trying to figure it out. “Everything happens for a reason,” we say. But keep in mind that life happens. All of life’s mysteries can never be fully explained or demonstrated with certainty and proof. We should not waste our time worrying about the “what ifs.” You’re where you are today because of a combination of random events and your own personal choices. Accept the situation. It’s simple: If you’re unhappy or if you want to change, simply alter your expectations. The past is unalterable. So, it only makes sense to live a life free of regret. Recognize reality for what it is. The words of Emerson bring us back to Emerson again, “If we truly live, we shall truly see…,” the saying goes. We will gladly discard the memory of its hoarded treasures as old rubbish when we have a new perception. “That’s the way it is. As simple as changing your current thoughts if they are no longer relevant to your situation. Do you get the picture? Your life has always been filled with joy. The thing is, you don’t see it very often. It’s only when you stop searching for it outside of yourself that you’ll realise how much more capable you are of loving others. Because you can, not because you should.