How often do you feel isolated? I miss someone for many reasons and that’s what this is. It’s our belief that everyone should feel lonely when they’re on their own. Having a sense of isolation can be a very real experience. That’s not something I’m going to argue about—I’ll leave that to the world’s psychiatrists. To those who take things literally, this article is not for you. Please continue reading if you are willing to be open-minded. Loneliness is a waste of time and energy. That’s why I don’t believe in the existence of loneliness. It’s a story that we, as a species, have concocted.
  Here are a few examples of what I mean:
- It’s a good idea to have at least 500 close friends.
- To be single is to be a scumbag.
- Divorce means you’ve failed.
- People who are crazy life alone.
Loneliness becomes a problem when we begin to believe in it. Loneliness, in this case, is detrimental to your mental health. You’re never alone, it’s just that you don’t realise it yet. You’ll always have someone to talk to: your own mind. As a result, being by yourself without feeling lonely is possible. The author of Awareness, Anthony de Mello, sums it up thusly: For the most part, “loneliness is when you miss people, and aloneness is when you are having fun.”
Our society is unfamiliar with this concept. We’ve been conditioned to believe that we need constant companionship. People who take a vacation by themselves are considered strange. The same goes for me. When I was a kid, my parents used to tell me, “Who goes on a trip alone? Isn’t that boring?!” False. It’s a lot of fun to spend time with yourself if you can.
George Bernard Shaw, the celebrated playwright, was once spotted at a cocktail party. You’ve been through this before, haven’t you? Even the most unique of celebrations, like a birthday party or a conference gala, tend to follow a pattern of the same old things. With others, you simply chitchat about nothing. When someone asked Shaw if he was having fun, he replied: “I’m having a blast. “This is the only thing I’m looking forward to about this trip. Even if you’re not having a good time at a particular location, you can always enjoy yourself.
Social life might be an option.
We’re social creatures, and I firmly believe in the value of close personal relationships. Having a good relationship is crucial. A life of solitude is not what I’m advocating. Let’s face it, though. What percentage of the time did you feel isolated in the past? “Aloneness” training is in order if you even answered once. All you have to do is get used to yourself.
Take a look at these two options:
- Keep your focus on yourself instead of focusing on other people.
I don’t want you to become a person who isn’t empathetic. You don’t have to give up. Just keep your distance.
- Do more on your own
Find a task you can perform at any time, anywhere. Create music, start a business or any number of other endeavours that interest you. You get the picture. Setting a goal helps motivates one to pursue it. It’s great if others want to join you. In that case, no worries! Freedom comes from being alone. You don’t have to rely on others to have fun. The root of the issue is a sense of dependency and attachment. We’re annoying when we’re desperate. Somehow, we’re able to tell when someone else is in a precarious position. The friend who repeatedly attempts to contact you. It’s the salesman who insists that you try his product. The person who’s clamouring for your notice. Isn’t it obvious to you? However, if we switch roles, we suddenly become blind.
Invest in a mirror. That is something I have also done. You’ll discover that you’re a lot more dependent on others than you thought. There is a downside to this, however. It’s time to stop being so dependent on others. To feel at ease in your own skin, you don’t need anyone else’s approval. It’s ironic that the more people you meet, the more comfortable you become being alone. Isn’t it crazy? That is who we are. We’re drawn to things that don’t require our presence. This means that even if you don’t want to be, you will never be alone. All of this, however, begins with the conviction that you are never alone.
In the face of such loneliness, how can one be content?
A lot of people aren’t on board with this. As a result, most people won’t be on board with you. But it’s for this reason that so many people are dissatisfied. However, do you manage to keep yourself from feeling desperate or abandoned? That’s been on my mind a lot lately. I’ve read a lot of books and tried to figure out how to be content and at ease in your own company. Everyday activities like keeping a journal, working out, reading, and gaining knowledge are effective. There’s one factor, however, that has the greatest impact: Awakening awareness. A regular meditation routine is something we all need to incorporate into our daily routines. Most of my readers, like myself, are down-to-earth realists. That implies that you’re not completely at ease with the idea of meditation, don’t you think so? Maybe you don’t see any advantages to it?
Here’s the thing: Meditating on a regular basis will increase your level of awareness. And that’s what you’re going for. Those who believe that meditation is an end in and of itself are missing the point. The path to awakening is paved with the practice of meditation. Simply put, it’s an approach. Mediation, on the other hand, is a wide-ranging concept. When I say “meditation,” I’m not just talking about sitting or retreats. I’m also not talking about which type of meditation is the best. Walking meditation, Mindfulness, Transcendental, you name it. You can choose any type you like.” Use an app, a training course, or a coach. It makes no difference. Waking Up is an app that I enjoy using. For the past year, I’ve been using it. I took his 50-day introductory course. I continued to meditate every day after that. It wasn’t long before I noticed a shift in my awareness. Stopping is all about becoming aware of your actions. It’s possible to stop when you’re aware. You can, but only if you’re aware of what you’re doing.
When my thoughts are jumbled, I’ll pull out the Waking Up app to clear my head. You know how it is when your mind wanders, doesn’t it? You can’t seem to get your thoughts under control; your head is constantly racing. Meditation can be done at this time. As a result of meditation, you’ll feel more at ease when you are alone. Awareness by de Mello and Michael A. Singer’s The Untethered Soul are excellent resources on this topic. We don’t need anything to be happy, according to the premise of both books. That’s just too unbelievable for some people. “Yes, but my wife left me,” they write in their emails to me. “I’m feeling a little lonely.” Look, I understand what you’re saying. Even though it is your own fault. Regardless of what happens, you have the ability to be content with your life. Just be receptive to the possibility. Otherwise, how can we help? “It’s nothing.” This stuff really does work, as I can attest to. When you’re ready, come back to it. You won’t require anything else to make you happy after you practise for a while. Whatever happens, you’ll be content. When you get to that point, you don’t feel lonely at all. It’s just being alone. My friend, I wish you the happiest of times alone.
