8 Reasons Why It Is So Hard To Really Change Your Behaviour

Press Play Button Below, Synchronize Reading & Listening "Habits Podcast" *An Audio Blog*

We are great at setting goals and bad at making any change in ourselves that will ultimately lead us to our success. Behavioural patterns are hardcoded in our brains and are somewhat unbreakable. Changing our behaviour for our betterment is on everyone’s agenda and yet sustained change is a tremendously difficult factor. So what is it that makes it so hard to change our behaviour?

We take the path of least resistance

Our brain quickly adapts to those habits that it can follow with ease. Repeating the activity makes it set in stone and we refuse to bring a change in our behaviour at a later stage. It traps us into no-win situations and gets us to be confined to our comfort zones.

We only want to take the largest step

Change is a gradual process. We all know that and yet fail to follow it. People quit eating and do all kinds of heavy workouts on day one and feel demotivated to walk on that path the following day. We want to achieve quick results and our focus lies on the results without making tiny efforts in our daily lives. This will never lead us to our goal. Change can be achieved by taking small measurable actions. These small efforts engaged over time will finally in cumulative change.

We rely too much on the arrival of ‘someday’

An excuse for not taking action is the wasteland called ‘someday’. We push our goals off until the far future and use this word as an escape mechanism. Procrastination will finally lead us to think about everything we are not doing. It leaves you broken, unsuccessful, out of shape, and largely depressed with your life.

We do not know what we need

Like the perfect toolbox is the answer to a broken car, knowledge about ourselves is essential to bring about a positive change in attitude. The fact that we cannot point out the negative aspects of ourselves is a big hindrance to valuable change. The emotional resources for understanding our faults are essential to battle against the resistance that we have against changing ourselves.

We want to become who we are not

Changing aspects of behaviour are misunderstood by changing oneself completely. In the view of changing for the better, most of us try and overachieve and also partly imitate someone we admire. The biggest mistake we do is to try to take on multiple behaviours and places unrealistic demands. This can only have one result- it dooms our efforts early on and we give up in no time.

We forget that failure is a crucial part of the journey

We fear failure and have a negative feeling attached to it. We forget that it is an important part of the changing process and bound to happen, even more than once. The error on our part is to see failure as an end instead of learning and a means to a new beginning.

We forget about the connecting elements

Too often our focus is on changing one behavioural pattern that we forget may be attached to other elements that require to be changed as well. Change is a process that considers all of the pieces and only then produces success. We fool ourselves into believing it is easy and neglect the process-oriented challenges that we face at every step.

We are fickle-minded

When we set our eyes on something, we want that so strongly that when it becomes too time-consuming, too demanding, and requires patience, we do not feel the need for it anymore. The commitment we need towards making the change in our behaviour is often beaten by setbacks that our brain proposes. Having a firm mind to a set goal is usually what we all lack as humans.

Changing habits cries for a higher level of self-awareness. The human brain is incredibly adaptable and all you need is a set of strong strategies that make behavioural patterns easy to change. The more optimistic energy you extend, the more you will positively grow.

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Dr Purushothaman (LivingInWellbeing)